Force the Issue

June 8, 2010

I had 3 options for this morning. My body wanted to go back to sleep since I just tossed and turned for most part of the night before. My head's logic wanted to just go straight to the office and get a headstart on the day's work. My heart though wanted to run. I've wanted to run since the day before. And I had meant to do go on the promise I made myself.

My abdomen and bowel had their own ideas -- they instigated a rebellion early in the morning. I groaned as I got up, feeling weak.

"No, this will get done," I said in my head.

I decided to force the issue. I needed to overcome the stubborn desires of laziness and procrastination. I figured that if I overcame my head and my body, I could do the same with the bullies I had to face during the day.

I showered. Dressed up. Pulled my hair back into a ponytail. And then without really being so conscious of it, I reached that tipping point, when the silence of one's resolve deafens the static of all the "no's" and "cannot's".

My mind and my body eventually realized that we were going for a run. And the pain subsided on its own.

An hour or so later, I had the happy reward of a hot shower. I had just finished a short run, a little less than 3k on the treadmill, at Pumba-pace (read: slow. Well, that's at least how it's defined now). Coming from a household where water heaters have become unheard of, a warm bath is such pure joy.

I bent my head and pressed the top of it against the shower wall. I let the water beat down on my nape and shoulders. It felt good. As the warm water trickled on my back, I reveled in the joy that I had won over myself. That felt even better.